Great Husband- wife Jokes

rajnish manga · 25-03-2015, 11:06 AM

Great Husband- wife Jokes

A bookseller conducting a market survey asked a woman – “Which book has helped you most in your life?”

The woman replied – “My husband’s cheque book !!”

**

A prospective husband in a booask store “Do you have a book called, ‘Husband – the Master of the House’?

Sales Girl : “Sir, Fiction and Comics are on the 1st floor!”

rajnish manga · 25-03-2015, 11:09 AM

Someone asked an old man : “Even after 70 years, you still call your wife – Darling, Honey, Luv. What’s the secret ?

Old man : I forgot her name and I’m scared to ask her.

**

A man in Hell asked Devil : Can I make a call to my Wife ?

After making call he asked how much to pay.

Devil : Nothing. Hell to hell is Free.

rajnish manga · 25-03-2015, 11:12 AM

Wife : I wish I was a newspaper. So I’d be in your hands all day.

Husband : I too wish that you were a newspaper. So I could have a new one every day !

**

Husband to wife – Today is a fine day.

Next day he says : Today is a fine day.

Again next day, he says same thing – Today is a fine day.

Finally after a week, the wife can’t take it and asks her husband – since last one week, you are saying this “Today is a fine day’. I am fed up. What’s the matter?

Husband : Last week when we had an argument, you said, “I will leave you one fine day.” I was just trying to remind you……

rajnish manga · 30-07-2015, 02:33 PM

Hearing impaired wife

Rakesh was worried that his wife was having an hearing problem and he thought she might need a hearing aid. Not quite sure how to approach her, he called the family Doctor to discuss the problem.

The Doctor told him there is a simple informal test the husband could perform to give the Doctor a better idea about her hearing loss.

"Here's what you do," said the Doctor, "stand about 40 feet away from her, and in a normal conversational speaking tone see if she hears you. If not, go to 30 feet, then 20 feet, and so on until you get a response.."

That evening, his wife was in the kitchen cooking dinner, and Rakesh thought of testing the same. He says to himself, "I'm about 40 feet away, let's see what happens.?"

Then in a normal tone he asks, "Honey, what's for dinner?"

No response....

So he moves closer to the kitchen, about 30 feet from his wife and repeats, "Honey, what's for dinner?"

Still No response...

Next he moves to the dining room where he is about 20 feet from his Wife and asks, "Honey, what's for dinner?"

Again he gets No response...

So, he walks up to the kitchen door, about 10 feet away. "Honey, what's for dinner?"

Again there is No response....

So he walks right up behind her,
"Honey, what's for dinner?"

*

*
*
*
*

"For God's sake Rakesh,
its the FIFTH time I am telling you,
its 'AALOO PARATHA'.!"

25-03-2015, 11:06 AM	#1
rajnish manga Super Moderator Join Date: Aug 2012 Location: Faridabad, Haryana, India Posts: 13,293 Rep Power: 242	Great Husband- wife Jokes Great Husband- wife Jokes A bookseller conducting a market survey asked a woman – “Which book has helped you most in your life?” The woman replied – “My husband’s cheque book !!” ** A prospective husband in a booask store “Do you have a book called, ‘Husband – the Master of the House’? Sales Girl : “Sir, Fiction and Comics are on the 1st floor!” __________________ आ नो भद्रा: क्रतवो यन्तु विश्वतः (ऋग्वेद) (Let noble thoughts come to us from every side)

25-03-2015, 11:09 AM	#2
rajnish manga Super Moderator Join Date: Aug 2012 Location: Faridabad, Haryana, India Posts: 13,293 Rep Power: 242	Re: Great Husband- wife Jokes Someone asked an old man : “Even after 70 years, you still call your wife – Darling, Honey, Luv. What’s the secret ? Old man : I forgot her name and I’m scared to ask her. ** A man in Hell asked Devil : Can I make a call to my Wife ? After making call he asked how much to pay. Devil : Nothing. Hell to hell is Free. __________________ आ नो भद्रा: क्रतवो यन्तु विश्वतः (ऋग्वेद) (Let noble thoughts come to us from every side)

25-03-2015, 11:12 AM	#3
rajnish manga Super Moderator Join Date: Aug 2012 Location: Faridabad, Haryana, India Posts: 13,293 Rep Power: 242	Re: Great Husband- wife Jokes Wife : I wish I was a newspaper. So I’d be in your hands all day. Husband : I too wish that you were a newspaper. So I could have a new one every day ! ** Husband to wife – Today is a fine day. Next day he says : Today is a fine day. Again next day, he says same thing – Today is a fine day. Finally after a week, the wife can’t take it and asks her husband – since last one week, you are saying this “Today is a fine day’. I am fed up. What’s the matter? Husband : Last week when we had an argument, you said, “I will leave you one fine day.” I was just trying to remind you…… __________________ आ नो भद्रा: क्रतवो यन्तु विश्वतः (ऋग्वेद) (Let noble thoughts come to us from every side)

30-07-2015, 02:33 PM	#4
rajnish manga Super Moderator Join Date: Aug 2012 Location: Faridabad, Haryana, India Posts: 13,293 Rep Power: 242	Re: Great Husband- wife Jokes Hearing impaired wife Rakesh was worried that his wife was having an hearing problem and he thought she might need a hearing aid. Not quite sure how to approach her, he called the family Doctor to discuss the problem. The Doctor told him there is a simple informal test the husband could perform to give the Doctor a better idea about her hearing loss. "Here's what you do," said the Doctor, "stand about 40 feet away from her, and in a normal conversational speaking tone see if she hears you. If not, go to 30 feet, then 20 feet, and so on until you get a response.." That evening, his wife was in the kitchen cooking dinner, and Rakesh thought of testing the same. He says to himself, "I'm about 40 feet away, let's see what happens.?" Then in a normal tone he asks, "Honey, what's for dinner?" No response.... So he moves closer to the kitchen, about 30 feet from his wife and repeats, "Honey, what's for dinner?" Still No response... Next he moves to the dining room where he is about 20 feet from his Wife and asks, "Honey, what's for dinner?" Again he gets No response... So, he walks up to the kitchen door, about 10 feet away. "Honey, what's for dinner?" Again there is No response.... So he walks right up behind her, "Honey, what's for dinner?" * * * * * "For God's sake Rakesh, its the FIFTH time I am telling you, its 'AALOO PARATHA'.!" __________________ आ नो भद्रा: क्रतवो यन्तु विश्वतः (ऋग्वेद) (Let noble thoughts come to us from every side)