Humour Unlimited

[anjaan]

Mnagr-Sir pakistan se 15 inch ke condom ka order aaya h.

Owner-Ye log hume nicha dikhana chahte h,

ok,

bana do aur us par likh dena

"BABY SIZE"..

[anjaan]

[anjaan]

[anjaan]

Girl : tumhe meri yaad aaye to kya krte ho?

Boy: tumhare pasand ki chocolate kha leta hu.. Tum kya krti ho?

Girl : me b ek choti gold flake pi leti hu..

[anjaan]

There was a man who had three sons. He gave each of them a duck and told
them to go out and sell their duck for as much as possible.


The first son went out and sold his duck for $5, went home and told his dad what he had done. His father congratulated him and told him to go and buy himself a beer.

The second son also sold his duck for $5. His father congratulated him and told him to go and buy himself a beer.

The third son went out and saw a gorgeous blonde woman on the side of the road. He went up to her and said I'll give you my duck if you have sex with me. She considered it and said "Ok". They had sex and when they were done she said wow that was good, I'll give you your duck back if you'll do me again. The boy agreed.

While they were having sex again, the duck got loose and ran out into the road. They saw the duck escape and pulled their pants on but not quickly enough to prevent the duck from getting run over by a car. The driver jumped out of the car and said "I'm so sorry I killed your duck. I'll give you $40 dollars to make up for it.

When the third son finally returned home, his dad asked how much he had made. He said "I got a f**k for a duck, a duck for a f**k, and forty bucks for a f**ked up duck...xD

[anjaan]

Beta: Papa apki shaadi ho gayi...??
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Papa: Haan.
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Beta: Kis se hui..??

Papa: Bewkoof teri mummy se..
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Beta: Wah papa ghar me hi setting kar li.

[anjaan]

Ladka ladki ko pataa ke car me jungle le gaya. Ladke ne sex shuru kiya to ladki boli: "Mein bataana bhool gayi ki mein Prostitute hu aur ek baar ke 500 leti hu."
Ladke ne majboori me paise diye aur thoka. Thokne ke baad ladka cigarette peene laga.
Ladki- chalona wapas nahi jaana kya?
"Ladka-Mein bataana bhool gaya tha ki mein Taxi Driver hu aur yaha se shahar ke 800 leta hoon.

[anjaan]

Akbar: Hamare ammi abba humse itni mohabt karte thhe,
ke hame sulane k lie sari sari raat jagte rehte, or hum fir b na
sote the.
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Birbal: Tbhi to aap eklote reh gaye huzoor.

[anjaan]

Santa TRAIN me chadne laga Akashwani hui:
"Isme mat chad
ye patri se utar jayegi"
.
PLANE me chadne laga
Aawaj aayi
"Ye crash ho jayega"
.
BUS me aawaj aayi
"Ye khai me gir jayegi"
.
Santa gusse se-"Kaun hai?"
Aawaz aai-"GOD"
.
Santa-"Shadi k waqt GHODI chad raha tha, tab tumhara gala baith gaya tha kya?

[anjaan]