Punography

[rajnish manga]

The public is wonderfully tolerant. It forgives everything except genius.

Fashion is a form of ugliness so intolerable we are compelled to alter it every six months.

America is the only country that went from barbarism to decencies without civilization in between.

To disagree with three-fourths of the British public is one of the first requisites of sanity.

Do not speak ill of society ... only people who can't get in do that.

[rajnish manga]

People who fly into a rage always make a bad landing.

The only way you can beat the lawyers is to die with nothing.

The United States never lost a war or won a conference.

There is no more independence in politics than there is in jail.

There is nothing so stupid as the educated man if you get him off his subject.

Things in our country run in spite of government, not by aid of it.

[rajnish manga]

We will never have true civilization until we have learned to recognize the rights of others.

What the country needs is dirtier fingernails and cleaner minds.

If there's one thing we do worse than any other nation, it's managing somebody else's affairs.

The only difference between death and taxes is that death doesn't get worse every time Congress meets.

Some men learn by reading. A few learn by observation. The rest have to pee on the electric fence for themselves.

[rajnish manga]

Advertisement In Shop:


Guitar, for Sale........ Cheap........
....... no strings attached.



Ad. In Hospital Waiting Room:

Smoking Helps You Lose Weight....
One Lung At A Time!

[rajnish manga]

On a bulletin board:
Success Is Relative.
The more The Success,
The more The Relatives.



When I Read About The Evils Of Drinking....
I Gave Up Reading.

[rajnish manga]

My Grandfather Is Eighty
And Still Doesn't Need Glasses....
He Drinks Straight Out Of The Bottle.



Sign In A Bar:
'Those Of You Who Are Drinking To Forget,
Please do Pay In Advance.'

[rajnish manga]

Sign In Driving School:
If Your Wife Wants To Learn To Drive,
Don't Stand In Her Way.



Behind Every Great Man,
There Is A Surprised Woman.

[rajnish manga]

Laugh And The World Laughs With You,
Snore And You sleep Alone.



The Surest Sign
That Intelligent Life Exists
Elsewhere In The Universe
Is The Fact That It Has Never Tried To Contact Us.

[rajnish manga]

Sign At A Barber's Shop:

We Need Your Heads To Run Our Business.


Sign In A Restaurant:


All Drinking Water In This Establishment
Has Been Personally Passed By The Manager.

[Jasleen-Kaur]

Originally Posted by internetpremi

Silly Hinglish Puns for idle Desis only.
=============================

Which tree is always wearing an undershirt?
Banyan Tree

Why is it so expensive for Ravana to go dining in a posh restaurant?
Because they charge per head


Why are desi bananas so lonely?
Because they are all a-kela.

What did Dominos pizza say to make its competitors go away?
Pizza HUT!

At a job interview at Microsoft, the interviewer asked the applicant to “name four versions of Java.”
Desi response: “Mar java, mit java, lut java, mai sadkay java.

Why did the desi astronaut send a rose to the moon?
Because he loved gulab ja-moon.

What did one milk carton say to the other?
“What’s up, dood?”

How do fat desis get to work?
On motacycles

What’s the biggest contradiction in Tamil cinema?
Rajnikant. Because there’s nothing Rajni can’t do.


What did one pea say to the other?
I don’t know, they were muttering.


Which Indian food is a complete food?
Puri.

What do true Bollywood fans eat?
Aishwarya Raita, Anupam Kheer, Juhi Chavala, Mahesh Bhatura, Padmini Kholapuri,

Why is selling mangoes considered a humble profession?
Because mangoes are sold by the aam aadmi.

What do the police do to people who steal eggs?
Put them unda arrest.

What is our countrymen's emblem?
Aye mere watan ke logo

What did the mouse say to the cheese?
Tu cheez badi hai mast mast!!

What did the potato say when he picked up the phone?
Aloo?