Funny Jokes.... - Page 54

anjaan · 17-06-2012, 03:59 PM

Some tourists in the Punjab Museum of Natural History were marveling at the dinosaur bones. One of them asked the guard, Santa Singh 'Can you tell me how old the dinosaur bones are?' Santa replied, 'They are 3 million, four years, and six months old.' 'That's an awfully exact number,' says the tourist. 'How do you know their age so precisely?' Santa answered, 'Well, the dinosaur bones were three million years old when I started working here, and that was four and a half years ago.

anjaan · 17-06-2012, 03:59 PM

A couple were returning to their seats in the dark theater.
The husband asked the fellow on the aisle,
"did someone step on your foot on the way out for intermission?"

"Yes, you did," the fellow replied, expecting an apology.

"Okay honey," the husband said. "This is our row."

anjaan · 17-06-2012, 04:00 PM

Santa and Banta had just bought two horses. Now the problem was that they could not differentiate between the two horses. So, one day Santa cuts the left ear of his horse, so that it is easy to know that it is his horse. While doing so, an enemy of Santa looks at him.

This enemy also cuts the left ear of Banta's horse. At this both Santa and Banta gets confused again .
So, Santa cuts off his horse's right ear , then his tail , then makes him blind and so on .And the enemy also kept on doing so with banta's horse. At last Santa's horse had no legs left and banta's horse was with one leg only .

The enemy also went and cut banta's horse one leg. So, in the morning it was the same situation , How to differentiate between their horses. So, after putting lots of effort to their mind - Santa said - O.K You keep the black one and i will keep the white .

anjaan · 17-06-2012, 04:01 PM

• Girl: Will u marry me?
Santa: No, humare yahan shaadi sirf relatives mein hi hoti hai. Mummy
ne Papa se, Didi ne Jijaji se aur Bhaiya ne Bhabhi se

anjaan · 17-06-2012, 04:01 PM

• Banta: Yeh chaaku kyon ubaal rahe ho?
Santa: Suicide karne ke liye
Banta: To phir ubalne kui kya zaroorat hai?
Santa: Kahin infection na ho jaaye

anjaan · 17-06-2012, 04:01 PM

• In a train compartment husband: Darling, mujhe to tumhari aatma se
pyar hai, tumhare jism ki mujhe koi chah nahin. Main tumhari rooh ko
chahta hoon, tumhara shareer to mein kutton ko daal doon.
Banta sitting on upper berth says: BOW BOW

anjaan · 17-06-2012, 04:02 PM

• Santa & Banta were going with their friend on one scooter & a traffic cop tried to stop them.
Santa said: Sorry bhaji, already 3 baithe hain bilkul bhi jagah nahin hai

anjaan · 17-06-2012, 04:02 PM

• Santa: Today is Sunday & I wanna njoy, so I bought 3 movie tickets
Jeeto: Why 3?
Santa: For u n ur parents

anjaan · 17-06-2012, 04:02 PM

• Banta: Y do u take ur wife only to night clubs?
Santa: By the time she gets ready no other place is open

anjaan · 17-06-2012, 04:03 PM

SANTA, tired, just wants to take a nap, so he politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks.
The American persists and explains that the game is easy and a lot of fun.
He says, "I ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer, you pay me $5, and vice versa."
Again, SANTA declines and tries to get some sleep.
The American, now worked up, says, "Okay, if you don't know the answer, you pay me $5,
and if I don't know the answer, I'll pay you $500."
This gets SANTA's attention and, figuring there will be no end to this torment, agrees to the game.
The American asks the first question, "What's the distance from the earth to the moon?"
SANTA doesn't say a word, reaches into his wallet, pulls out a $5 bill and hands it to the American.
"Okay," says the American, "Your turn."
So SANTA asks, "What goes up a hill with three legs and comes down with four legs?"
The American thinks about it. No answer. Puzzled, he takes out his laptop computer and searches all his references. No answer! He taps into the air-phone with his modem and searches the Internet and the Library of Congress. No answer.
Frustrated, he sends e-mails to all his friends and co-workers. Checks the input. All to no avail!
Finally, a long time later, he wakes SANTA and hands him $500.
SANTA thanks him and turns back to get his sleep.
The American, more than a little miffed, stirs SANTA and asks, "Well, what's the answer?"
Without a word, SANTA reaches into his purse, hands the American $5, and goes back to sleep!

17-06-2012, 03:59 PM	#531
anjaan Special Member Join Date: Jun 2010 Location: Jhumri Tillaiya Posts: 2,429 Rep Power: 22	Re: Funny Jokes.... Some tourists in the Punjab Museum of Natural History were marveling at the dinosaur bones. One of them asked the guard, Santa Singh 'Can you tell me how old the dinosaur bones are?' Santa replied, 'They are 3 million, four years, and six months old.' 'That's an awfully exact number,' says the tourist. 'How do you know their age so precisely?' Santa answered, 'Well, the dinosaur bones were three million years old when I started working here, and that was four and a half years ago.

17-06-2012, 03:59 PM	#532
anjaan Special Member Join Date: Jun 2010 Location: Jhumri Tillaiya Posts: 2,429 Rep Power: 22	Re: Funny Jokes.... A couple were returning to their seats in the dark theater. The husband asked the fellow on the aisle, "did someone step on your foot on the way out for intermission?" "Yes, you did," the fellow replied, expecting an apology. "Okay honey," the husband said. "This is our row."

17-06-2012, 04:00 PM	#533
anjaan Special Member Join Date: Jun 2010 Location: Jhumri Tillaiya Posts: 2,429 Rep Power: 22	Re: Funny Jokes.... Santa and Banta had just bought two horses. Now the problem was that they could not differentiate between the two horses. So, one day Santa cuts the left ear of his horse, so that it is easy to know that it is his horse. While doing so, an enemy of Santa looks at him. This enemy also cuts the left ear of Banta's horse. At this both Santa and Banta gets confused again . So, Santa cuts off his horse's right ear , then his tail , then makes him blind and so on .And the enemy also kept on doing so with banta's horse. At last Santa's horse had no legs left and banta's horse was with one leg only . The enemy also went and cut banta's horse one leg. So, in the morning it was the same situation , How to differentiate between their horses. So, after putting lots of effort to their mind - Santa said - O.K You keep the black one and i will keep the white .

17-06-2012, 04:01 PM	#534
anjaan Special Member Join Date: Jun 2010 Location: Jhumri Tillaiya Posts: 2,429 Rep Power: 22	Re: Funny Jokes.... • Girl: Will u marry me? Santa: No, humare yahan shaadi sirf relatives mein hi hoti hai. Mummy ne Papa se, Didi ne Jijaji se aur Bhaiya ne Bhabhi se

17-06-2012, 04:01 PM	#535
anjaan Special Member Join Date: Jun 2010 Location: Jhumri Tillaiya Posts: 2,429 Rep Power: 22	Re: Funny Jokes.... • Banta: Yeh chaaku kyon ubaal rahe ho? Santa: Suicide karne ke liye Banta: To phir ubalne kui kya zaroorat hai? Santa: Kahin infection na ho jaaye

17-06-2012, 04:01 PM	#536
anjaan Special Member Join Date: Jun 2010 Location: Jhumri Tillaiya Posts: 2,429 Rep Power: 22	Re: Funny Jokes.... • In a train compartment husband: Darling, mujhe to tumhari aatma se pyar hai, tumhare jism ki mujhe koi chah nahin. Main tumhari rooh ko chahta hoon, tumhara shareer to mein kutton ko daal doon. Banta sitting on upper berth says: BOW BOW

17-06-2012, 04:02 PM	#537
anjaan Special Member Join Date: Jun 2010 Location: Jhumri Tillaiya Posts: 2,429 Rep Power: 22	Re: Funny Jokes.... • Santa & Banta were going with their friend on one scooter & a traffic cop tried to stop them. Santa said: Sorry bhaji, already 3 baithe hain bilkul bhi jagah nahin hai

17-06-2012, 04:02 PM	#538
anjaan Special Member Join Date: Jun 2010 Location: Jhumri Tillaiya Posts: 2,429 Rep Power: 22	Re: Funny Jokes.... • Santa: Today is Sunday & I wanna njoy, so I bought 3 movie tickets Jeeto: Why 3? Santa: For u n ur parents

17-06-2012, 04:02 PM	#539
anjaan Special Member Join Date: Jun 2010 Location: Jhumri Tillaiya Posts: 2,429 Rep Power: 22	Re: Funny Jokes.... • Banta: Y do u take ur wife only to night clubs? Santa: By the time she gets ready no other place is open

17-06-2012, 04:03 PM	#540
anjaan Special Member Join Date: Jun 2010 Location: Jhumri Tillaiya Posts: 2,429 Rep Power: 22	Re: Funny Jokes.... SANTA, tired, just wants to take a nap, so he politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks. The American persists and explains that the game is easy and a lot of fun. He says, "I ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer, you pay me $5, and vice versa." Again, SANTA declines and tries to get some sleep. The American, now worked up, says, "Okay, if you don't know the answer, you pay me $5, and if I don't know the answer, I'll pay you $500." This gets SANTA's attention and, figuring there will be no end to this torment, agrees to the game. The American asks the first question, "What's the distance from the earth to the moon?" SANTA doesn't say a word, reaches into his wallet, pulls out a $5 bill and hands it to the American. "Okay," says the American, "Your turn." So SANTA asks, "What goes up a hill with three legs and comes down with four legs?" The American thinks about it. No answer. Puzzled, he takes out his laptop computer and searches all his references. No answer! He taps into the air-phone with his modem and searches the Internet and the Library of Congress. No answer. Frustrated, he sends e-mails to all his friends and co-workers. Checks the input. All to no avail! Finally, a long time later, he wakes SANTA and hands him $500. SANTA thanks him and turns back to get his sleep. The American, more than a little miffed, stirs SANTA and asks, "Well, what's the answer?" Without a word, SANTA reaches into his purse, hands the American $5, and goes back to sleep!