Share Santa and Banta Jokes - Page 9

Ripa · 04-07-2010, 11:24 PM

Can I borrow that book of yours How To Become A Millionaire?
Sure. Here you are.
Thanks - but half the pages are missing.
What's the matter? Isn't half a million enough for you?

Ripa · 04-07-2010, 11:24 PM

Fred collected lots of money from trick-or-treating and he went to the candy store to buy some chocolate.
"You should give that money to charity," said the sales girl.
Fred thought for a moment and said, "No, I'll buy the chocolate. You give the money to charity."

Madhu · 10-07-2010, 08:29 AM

Santa: Why are you heating the knife.

Banta: To do suicide.

Santa: But why are you heating it?

Banta: To prevent infection.

Madhu · 10-07-2010, 08:32 AM

Santa & Banta got tired using mobile cell phones. For a change, they decided to use pigeons to send sweet messages. And this hilarious scheme worked very fine.

One day Santa sends his pigeon.

Banta sees, the pigeon is without any message. He picks his mobile and asks Santa: The pigeon is without any sweet message.

Santa: Oye khotey, that was a missed call.

Madhu · 10-07-2010, 08:36 AM

Banta to Lawyer: What is your fees?

Lawyer: Rs 5000/- for 3 questions.

Banta: Isn't it too high?

Lawyer: Yes, it is. What is your third question?

Madhu · 10-07-2010, 08:37 AM

Santa asks Priest: Why did god make women so beautiful?

Priest: So that you will love them.

Santa thinks for a short time...

Santa: But why did God make them so dumb?

Priest: So that they will love you.

Madhu · 10-07-2010, 08:40 AM

Santa: I got married because I was tired of cooking, clean ing home and washing clothes.

Banta: Amazing, I got divorce for the same reason.

Madhu · 10-07-2010, 08:41 AM

Santa was weeping at a grave, "Why did you die? Why did you die? Your death ruined my life."

Banta: For whom do you mourn so deeply? A child? A parent? Wife? or Girlfriend ?

Santa: My wife’s first husband.

Madhu · 10-07-2010, 08:44 AM

Santa: Why do you close your eyes while playing the piano?

Banta: I can't see the agony of the audience.

Madhu · 10-07-2010, 08:45 AM

Manager: Sorry, but I can't give u a job. I don't have any more work.

Santa: That's all right, sir. In fact I'm just the right person in this case. You see, I won't ask you to give me work anyway!!

04-07-2010, 11:24 PM	#81
Ripa Member Join Date: Jun 2010 Posts: 17 Rep Power: 0	Can I borrow that book of yours How To Become A Millionaire? Sure. Here you are. Thanks - but half the pages are missing. What's the matter? Isn't half a million enough for you?

10-07-2010, 08:29 AM	#83
Madhu Senior Member Join Date: Jun 2010 Posts: 494 Rep Power: 18	Santa: Why are you heating the knife. Banta: To do suicide. Santa: But why are you heating it? Banta: To prevent infection.

10-07-2010, 08:32 AM	#84
Madhu Senior Member Join Date: Jun 2010 Posts: 494 Rep Power: 18	Santa & Banta got tired using mobile cell phones. For a change, they decided to use pigeons to send sweet messages. And this hilarious scheme worked very fine. One day Santa sends his pigeon. Banta sees, the pigeon is without any message. He picks his mobile and asks Santa: The pigeon is without any sweet message. Santa: Oye khotey, that was a missed call.

10-07-2010, 08:36 AM	#85
Madhu Senior Member Join Date: Jun 2010 Posts: 494 Rep Power: 18	Banta to Lawyer: What is your fees? Lawyer: Rs 5000/- for 3 questions. Banta: Isn't it too high? Lawyer: Yes, it is. What is your third question?

10-07-2010, 08:37 AM	#86
Madhu Senior Member Join Date: Jun 2010 Posts: 494 Rep Power: 18	Santa asks Priest: Why did god make women so beautiful? Priest: So that you will love them. Santa thinks for a short time... Santa: But why did God make them so dumb? Priest: So that they will love you.

10-07-2010, 08:40 AM	#87
Madhu Senior Member Join Date: Jun 2010 Posts: 494 Rep Power: 18	Santa: I got married because I was tired of cooking, clean ing home and washing clothes. Banta: Amazing, I got divorce for the same reason.

10-07-2010, 08:41 AM	#88
Madhu Senior Member Join Date: Jun 2010 Posts: 494 Rep Power: 18	Santa was weeping at a grave, "Why did you die? Why did you die? Your death ruined my life." Banta: For whom do you mourn so deeply? A child? A parent? Wife? or Girlfriend ? Santa: My wife’s first husband.

10-07-2010, 08:44 AM	#89
Madhu Senior Member Join Date: Jun 2010 Posts: 494 Rep Power: 18	Santa: Why do you close your eyes while playing the piano? Banta: I can't see the agony of the audience.

10-07-2010, 08:45 AM	#90
Madhu Senior Member Join Date: Jun 2010 Posts: 494 Rep Power: 18	Manager: Sorry, but I can't give u a job. I don't have any more work. Santa: That's all right, sir. In fact I'm just the right person in this case. You see, I won't ask you to give me work anyway!!