Forwarded ईमेल का सूत्र

[teji]

Rajini Style.

[teji]

[teji]

15 reasons why alcohol should be served at work:

1. It's an incentive for staff to show up.
2. It leads to more honest communications.
3. It reduces complaints about low pay.
4. Employees tell management what they think, not what they want to hear.
5. It encourages car pooling.
6. Increase job satisfaction because if you have a bad job, you don't care when you are pissed.
7. It eliminates leave time because people would rather come to work.
8. It makes fellow employees look better.
9. It makes the cafeteria food taste better.
10. Bosses are more likely to hand out raises when they are drunk.
11. Salary negotiations are a lot more profitable.
12. Employees work later since there's no longer a need to relax at a bar after work.
13. It makes everyone more open with their ideas.
14. Eliminates the need for employees to get drunk only on their lunch break.
15. Employees no longer need coffee to sober up if they can stay drunk (upto a limit... of course)

[teji]

[teji]

[ndhebar]

Umbrella Thief

A man gave all of his seven umbrellas for repair at one time and told the shopkeeper he would pick it up in the evening while back from work. On the way to work in Bus, out of habit he grabbed the umbrella of the woman sitting next to him, got up and started walking. The woman started yelled, "Umbrella thief, Umbrella thief."

The embarrassed guy returned the umbrella and apologized, before getting abused and beaten up by other woman loving passengers.

In the evening he picked up all his umbrellas repaired, put them under his arms and started walking towards home. Unfortunately the morning lady returning from work bumped into him.

The lady commented, "Seems, you had a profitable day at work today."

[teji]

What If IPL Was Nationalized?

What would happen if the Indian Premier League (IPL) was nationalized? Knowing our country's politics, here are a few guesses!

1. The new Commissioner of the IPL, replacing Lalit Modi, will be an IAS officer, 1989 batch, transferred from the Food Corporation of India.

2. Mayawati will demand, however, that the new Chairman should be her own candidate, Mr Dalit Modi.

3. The name of Mumbai Indians will immediately be changed to Mumbai Manus. It will, naturally, field only Maharashtrians (preferably Maharshtrian Brahmins). All other players will have their legs broken.

4. The Chennai Super Kings team will renamed Dravida Cricket Kazhagam. Subsequently one faction will break away and the team will split into DCK (DMK) and AIADCK, owing allegience to Karunanidhi and Jayalalitha respectively.

5. Each political party will have its own team: BJP Bandits, Congress Cobras, CPI Cadres, Samajwadi Strikers, CPM Challengers, Trinamul Tigers etc.

6. Auction of players will be replaced by teams calling for tenders for players. The lowest priced players will be picked.

7. Extraaa Innings will be replaced by honourable ministers who will give speeches during breaks in the match.

8. Sonia Gandhi will insists that 30% of each team should be reserved for women.

9. Mayawati will demand that SC/ST players will need to run for only 18 yards instead of 22 yards between the wickets.

10. Third Umpire requests will have to be filled in triplicate and duly notarized.

11. All Third Umpire decisions will be referred to a Joint Parlimentary Commission.

12. IPL tickets will henceforth be available at all post offices and BSNL centers from 10 a.m. to 12.45 p.m. The facility to purchase tickets on your cell-phone will immediately be withdrawn.

13. Replacing an injured foreign player can be done only through a Tatkal application submitted 48 hours after a Govt doctor examines him.

14. Cheerleaders will be replaced by retired Air-India flight attendants.

15. These new cheerleaders will perform the folk dances of the states they represent during breaks.

16. IPL matches will be shown only on Doordarshan. They will be telecast the day immediately following the match, from 4 a.m. to 7.30 a.m. and subsequently from 3.30 a.m. to 7p.m, subject to satellite link-up availability.

17. Between each innings break Doordarshan will telecast the news in Hindi, followed by news for the hearing impaired.

18. There will be no matches on weekends or on national/regional holidays.

19. The three stumps will be painted saffron, white and green.

20. Pakistan will immediately announce its intention to start its own version of the tournament called PPL and Mr Zardari will make a visit to Washington to meet President Obama and seek an additional grant of $1 billion to fund it.

[ndhebar]

Aur Batao Syndrome
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Guess we all r suffering frm it..
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Conversation between 2 software engg Friends:
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Sw1---hello
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SW2---hi
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Sw1---hey h r u???
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SW2---m fine!!! Wht abt u???
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SW1---m fine too
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SW2---cool
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SW1---so howz life???
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SW2--gud
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SW1--hmmmm
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SW1--aur batao? ( passing the ball to the other
side)
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SW2--hmmm everything as usual
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SW2--so wht else???
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SW1--nothing much
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SW2--ok
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SW2--aur batao? ( passing the ball to the other
side)
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And it goes on like this until they give up
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Are u also having such conversation with ur frnds,
then I guess u r also
suffering from aur batao syndrome It means ur life
is all screwed up
following the usual monotonous routine.
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Probably u need a change in ur life something which
is exciting,something
which is adventurous, something which really makes u
feel gud
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Correct????
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yeh sab to thik hai
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AUR BATAO :-)

[teji]

बॉस हमेशा बॉस ही होता है.

[teji]