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Old 31-03-2017, 10:35 PM   #12891
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Default Re: गुदगुदाते, चुटीले और मजेदार चुटकुले (Jokes)

पप्पु अपने ससुराल में गुरुजी का प्रवचन सुनने गया !
गुरुजी बोले, “जो-जो स्वर्ग जाना चाहता है, वह अपना हाथ ऊपर करे”!
पप्पु की बीवी और सास ने हाथ ऊपर उठाया !
गुरूजी ने पप्पु जी से पूछा, “क्या तुम स्वर्ग नहीं जाना चाहते?”
पप्पु,”गुरुजी, यह दोनों चली जायेंगी तो यही पर स्वर्ग हो जायेगा…”
गुरूजी अपने चेलों से बोले “ईस ज्ञानी पुरूष को अपनी टीम में शामील करो ।
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Old 31-03-2017, 10:39 PM   #12892
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Default Re: गुदगुदाते, चुटीले और मजेदार चुटकुले (Jokes)

लडके क्यों ब्लॉक किये जाते है जानीए :
लडका : तुम्हारा नाम क्या है ?
लडकी : Palak और तुम्हारा ??
लडका : Paneer !!!
*BLOCKED!!!*
लडकी : Whats UP ?
लडका : Uttar Pradesh
*BLOCKED!!!*
लडकी : तू सोया है…??
लडका : नहीं…! मूंगफली हूँ…
**BLOCKED!!!*
लडकी : See ya !
लडका : वर रामचंद्र की जय !
*BLOCKED!!!*
लडकी : Have a Good Day
लडका : नो स्वीटी, थैंक यु… मुझे पार्ले जी पसंद है
*तुरंत BLOCKED!!!*
लडका: थैंक यु
लडकी: माय प्लीज़र
लडका: माय पल्सर !!
*BLOCKED!!!
AND THE BEST ONE
झगड़ा होने के बाद
लडकी : तुम तो मुझे मनाते ही नहीं
लडका : तुम क्या हो ? होली हो ? दिवाली हो ? ईद हो ? जनम दिन हो?
BROKE FOREVER
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Old 31-03-2017, 10:41 PM   #12893
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Default Re: गुदगुदाते, चुटीले और मजेदार चुटकुले (Jokes)

टीचर: सच और वहम में क्या अंतर है?

स्टूडेंट: आप हमें पढ़ा रही हैं, वह सच है लेकिन...हम सब पढ़ रहे हैं, यह आपका वहम है।
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Old 31-03-2017, 10:43 PM   #12894
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Default Re: गुदगुदाते, चुटीले और मजेदार चुटकुले (Jokes)

टीचर-तुम्हारे पापा क्या
करते है?
,
,
बॉय-सर, HDFCके मालिक हैं?
,
,
टीचर-Wah HDFC Bank?
,
,
बॉय: नही सर?
,
,
हीरालाल दही-बड़े &फालूदा सेंटर
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Old 31-03-2017, 10:43 PM   #12895
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Default Re: गुदगुदाते, चुटीले और मजेदार चुटकुले (Jokes)

गुटखा खाने वालों में उच्च संस्कार होते है .
वे बड़े शांत और मौन रहते हैं .
थूक कर केवल तभी बोलते हैं
जब बोलने की कीमत गुटखे से अधिक हो।।
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Old 31-03-2017, 10:44 PM   #12896
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Default Re: गुदगुदाते, चुटीले और मजेदार चुटकुले (Jokes)

किसी ने पूछा आप बकरे की बली क्यों देते हो शेर की क्यों नही देते? जुम्मन मियां बोले भाईजान दे तो दें पर ……जरा सी चूक हुई तो फिर ईद तो शेर ही मनाएगा
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Old 31-03-2017, 10:44 PM   #12897
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Default Re: गुदगुदाते, चुटीले और मजेदार चुटकुले (Jokes)

आज का ज्ञान,,,
.
जो ख़ुशी अपनी धोई हुई Bike को देखने में है,,,
.
.
वो ख़ुशी ,
आधा घंटा Makeup करके आयी हुई लडकी के तरफ देखने में नही।
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Old 31-03-2017, 10:45 PM   #12898
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Default Re: गुदगुदाते, चुटीले और मजेदार चुटकुले (Jokes)

माँग कर गुटका खाने वाले अपना स्टेटस डालते है,,,,
.
.
तू हमारी बराबरी क्या करे गी,हम तो राजनिगंधा भी flipkart से
मंगवाते है।…
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Old 31-03-2017, 10:46 PM   #12899
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Default Re: गुदगुदाते, चुटीले और मजेदार चुटकुले (Jokes)

लालू की death हुई तो राबड़ी देवी को चिंता हुई की लालू को स्वर्ग मे entry मिली की नहीं ।
ये पता करने के लिए राबड़ी ने भूत प्रेत बुलाने वाले से contact किया ।

लालू की आत्मा को बुलाया गया
राबड़ी : कैसे है लालू जी आप , मरने के बाद कैसा फील कर रहे है ।
लालू : हम तो बहुत मजे मे हूँ , न पॉलिटिक्स , ना कोई चारा घोटाला , ना कोई चिल्ल पों |
यहाँ हरे भरे खेत , साफ़ हवा , और बिलकुल शांति का माहौल है ।
हमको सारा दिन एक ही काम है
खाना और सोना ,
खाना और सोना ,
खाना और सोना

राबड़ी : धन्य हो देवी मइय्या , आप स्वर्ग सही सलामत पहुँच गए ।

लालू : स्वर्ग ???????? हम तो यहाँ पंजाब मैं भैंस का जनम लिया हूँ ।
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Old 31-03-2017, 10:48 PM   #12900
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Default Re: गुदगुदाते, चुटीले और मजेदार चुटकुले (Jokes)

एक व्यक्ति ने अपनी साइकिल पार्लियामेंट के पास खड़ी कर दी.
पुलिस वाला देखकर बोल – तुम्हें मालूम नहीं, कि यह वी. आई. पी. क्षेत्र है ? यहाँ से कितने सांसद, मन्त्री और बड़े-२ नेता इधर से गुजरते हैं.
व्यक्ति बोला – परवाह नहीं. मैंने अपनी साइकिल को ताला लगा दिया है !
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