Jokes for young generation

[bindujain]

Ek bar ek ladka samosa ke bich ke aalu ko kha raha tha aur bahar ke hisse ko phek raha tha.

Dushra dost usse poochta hai ke tum samose ke sirf aalu ko kyun kha rahe hoo?


Pehla: Doctor ne mujhe bahar ke chejo ko khane se mana kiya hai.

[bindujain]

passion bhai: Main ek baar jungle mein susu karne gaya toh waha per Sher tha.


amit bhai: Phir kya hua?

passion bhai: Maine Sher se kaha, “Pehle tum karlo, mera toh ho gaya hai.”

[bindujain]

Mayawati came to Lalu’s house with a goat…
Lalu : Bhaiswa ko kyun layi ho?



Maya : Dikhta nahi, goatwa hai.
Lalu : Hum goatwa se hi puch raha hu!!!

[bindujain]

Beta papa se: Papa main itna bada kab ho jaunga ki mummy se bina poochey ghar se bahar ja sakoo.



Papa thandi saans lete hue: Beta, itna bada toh abhi main bhi nahi hua hoon.

[bindujain]

Wife: Aji suniye, mujhe kisi mehengi jaga le ke chaliye na ji….

Husband: Chalo, tayyar ho jao…



Guess where he took her….
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Petrol pump!!!

[bindujain]

Saas to bahu (samjhate hue) - Dekho bahu.. Lajja, sharm..ye to aurat ka gahna hoti hai. is baat ko hamesha yaad rakhna..
Bahu to saas - Per maa ji, is gundagardi k jamaane me gahne pahanta kaun hai..

[bindujain]

Bahu: Maaji, yeh abhi tak nahi aaye, kahi koi ladki ka chakkar toh nahi hai unke ?


Maaji: Are kalmuhi tu toh hamesha galat hi sochti hai, Ho sakta hai ke kisi truck ke niche aa gaya ho!

[bindujain]

Mat Pooch Mohabbat May Kya Kya Zakham Khaye Hai

Doosri K Chakkar Me Pehli K Chaante Khaye Hai

Milne Gaye To Bhaiyon Se Ghoonse Khaye Hai

3 Din Jail, 4 Din Hospital Reh K Aaye Hai

Ek Nazar Dekhne Ko Girls College K Dhakke Khaye Hai

Bohat Baar Watch Man Se Pit K Aaye Hai

Uske Ghar K Saamne Himesh K Gaane Gaye Hai

Mat Pooch Mohabbat May Kya Kya Zakham Khaye Hai.

[bindujain]

Q. What did the teddy bear say when he was offered dessert?
A. No thanks, I'm stuffed!
Q. Who sits on babies?
A. A babysitter.
Q. What has arms and legs, but no head?
A. A chair!
Q. What runs but never walks?
A. Water!
Q. What is white when it's dirty and black when it's clean?
A. A blackboard!
Q. What did the light say when it was turned off?
A. I�m delighted!
Q. What has a head and a tail but no body?
A. A coin!
Q. What do you call a fairy who doesn't take a bath?
A. Stinkerbell!
Q. What is the richest kind of air?
A. Millionaire.
Q. Why did the girl throw the clock out the window?
A. Because she wanted to see time fly!
Q. Which is faster, cold or heat?
A. Heat, you can catch a cold!
Q. What jam can't be eaten on toast?
A. A traffic jam!
Q. Why did the golfer wear two sets of pants?
A. In case he got a whole in one!
Q. What two things can't you have for dinner?
A. Lunch and breakfast!
Q. Why did the baker stop making doughnuts?
A. He got fed up with the whole business!
Q. What's the hottest letter in the alphabet?
A. 'B', because it makes oil...Boil!
Q. Why did the pony cough?
A. He was a little hoarse!
Q. Why couldn't the skeleton go to the dance?
A. He had no body to go with!

[bindujain]

Q. How can you tell if Michael Jackson has company?
A. There's a big wheel parked outside his house.
Q. What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson?
A. One was the first to walk on the moon and the other ****s little boys up the ***.
Q. How does Michael Jackson pick his nose?
A. From a catalogue.
Q. Why did Michael Jackson place a phone call to Boyz-2-Men?
A. He thought it was a delivery service.
Q. What has 18 balls and 3 pubic hairs?
A. A Michael Jackson slumber party.
Q. Why does Hillary want to have sex with Bill Clinton first thing in the morning?
A. She wants to be the first lady.
Q. What's Bill Clinton's idea of safe sex?
A. When Hillary is out of town.
Q. Did you hear that Monica Lewinsky turned Republican?
A. The democrats left a bad taste in her mouth.
Q. How come Mike Tyson�s eye's water during sex?
A. Mace
Q. What does Ellen DeGeneris cook for dinner every night?
A. She doesn't, she eats out!
Q. Why can't the government put Magic Johnson on a stamp?
A. Everyone would be afraid to **** it.
Q. What's the difference between Christopher Reeves and OJ Simpson?
A. Christopher Reeves got the electric chair....and O.J walked!
Q. What's white and sticky and found on the bathroom wall?
A. George Michael's latest release.
Q. What do you call a man with a blackhead on his ****?
A. Hugh Grant.
Q. What's the difference between George Michael and a microwave oven?
A. A microwave stops when you open the door.

Q. How does Michael Jackson know its time for bed?
A. When the big hand is on the little hand.
Q. What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a plastic bag?
A. One is white, plastic and dangerous to young children, the other is a plastic bag.

Q. How did Helen Keller's mother punish her?
A. By rearranging the living-room furniture.
Q. What did Helen Keller do when she fell down the well?
A. She screamed her hands off.
Q. Why does Helen Keller masturbate with one hand?
A. So she can moan with the other.
Q. Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow?
A. Her dog was blind too.
Q. What did Helen Keller's parents do to punish her for swearing?
A. Washed her hands with soap.
Q. Why did Bill Clinton stop playing the saxophone?
A. He was too busy playing the hormonica.
Q. Do you know why Monica got a stain on her dress?
A. She didn't keep her mouth shut!
Q. What does Wal-Mart, Zellers and Michael Jackson have in common?
A. Boy's underwear half off.
Q. 100 Women Surveyed, "Would you have sex with Bill Clinton?"
A. 80% said not again.
Q. What's green and smells like Monica Lewinsky?
A. The pool table in the oval office.
Q. What does McDonald's and Michael Jackson have in common?
A. They both stick their meat in 13 year old buns.
Q. What does Bill Clinton and a country folk dancer have in common?
A. They both throw a ho down.
Q. Why did Bill Clinton name his new dog Buddy?
A. He couldn't bear to say "Come Spot... Come Spot!"