Humour Unlimited

[anjaan]

Employees of a Company are all worried. Some are roaming around.
Some are in loud discussions during office time.....
Some Trainees, who had just joined, notice this and enquire about what happened to a senior employee, they ask,

"What's going on?"
"Terrorists have kidnapped our Boss"
They're asking for Rs.10 Crores (2 MILLIOn US $) ransom,
otherwise they're going to douse him with petrol and set him on fire.
We're going from desk to desk, taking up a collection." One Trainee asks,
"How much is everyone giving, on average?
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. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . "About 1 liter."

[anjaan]

[anjaan]

[anjaan]

[anjaan]

[anjaan]

Sardar returns book to library, bangs it on table
says - What a s**t ?
"I read the whole book, too many character, no story
at all" ?.
Librarian : So, you are the one who took the Telephone
Directory....

Judge: Don't U have shame? It is d 3rd time U R coming to court.
Sardar to judge: U R coming daily, don't U have shame?

A sardarji photographer is focusing
a dead bodys face in a funeral function,
suddenly all dead persons relatives beat him.
why? He said SMILE PLEASE

A sardarji Doctor falls in Love with a Nurse.He writes a love letter to the Nurse :- I Love U sister....

[anjaan]

[anjaan]

Girl : hipnotize karna kya hota he?

Boy: kisi ko apne bas me karke usse apni marzi ke saare kaam krwana.

Girl:-
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chal jhoothe, usko to boyfriend banana kehte he

[anjaan]

Is registan mein phool kaise khilega
Is registan mein phool kaise khilega

Dhondo abhijeet dhondo kuch na kuch saboot jarur milega!!!




Ladies ke Sath kaun kaise Badtameeji karta hai.

Bank wala: Madam Aap So-So ke Lengi?

Fruit wala: Zara Kele ke Size To Dekho, Dil Khush Ho Jayega.

Petrol Wala: Kitna Dalun?

Dhobi: Bhabhiji Aap Kapde Nikalo, Mai Abhi Aata Hun.

Photocopy Wala : Madam Aage Piche dono Taraf Se Karun Ya Sirf ek Side Se .

[Awara]

Programming based songs (In Hindi)

* DO loop
Sau saal pehle, mujhe tumse pyaar tha Aaj bhi hai, aur kal bhi rahega

* IF THEN ELSE
Tum agar mujhko na chaaho to koi baat nahin Magar kisi aur ko chaahogi to mushkil hogi.

* RETURN statement
aa laut ke aaja mere meet tujhe mere geet bulaate hain

* Procedure call
aaja re ab mera dil pukaara

* malloc()
Yaad kiya dilne kahan ho tum?

* exit(), suspend
Ruk jaa o jaane waali ruk jaa

* for the infinite loop
hum tum, yug yug se ye geet milan ke gaate rahe hain, gaate rahenge hum tum...

* [remote login:]
tumse kuchh kehna hai, gar tum kuch kehne do

* [ network busy ]
suno - kaho, kaha - suna, kucha huwa kya? abhee to nahin...

* Two Recursive functions calling each other
muze kuch kahana hein, muze bhee kuch kahena hein pahle tum, pahle tum.....

* extern variable
hum hein rahee pyaar ke, humse kucha bhee na boliye jo bhee pyar se mila hum usike ho liye

* static/local variable
Jeena yahaan, marna yahaan iske siwa jaana kahan

* SUBROUTINE
Akela hoon mai, es duniya mein, na koi sathee hai......

* Mental state after a CLEAN COMPILE
Ek punjaban dil churake le gayee, hai...... sona sona ...... dil mera sona.....

* Completion of DESIGN SPECIFICATION
Chanda se hoga woh pyara, phoolon se hoga woh nyara, nachega aangan mei chamcham, nanha sa munna hamara.....

* FILE NOT FOUND
Na tum hame jano, na hum tumhe jane, magar lagta hai kutch aisa......

* Global application
Mera juuta hai japanee, yeh patloon enlishtani, sar pe lal topy roosi phir bhi dil hai hindustani......