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Old 16-09-2016, 11:44 AM   #12681
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Default Re: गुदगुदाते, चुटीले और मजेदार चुटकुले (Jokes)

एक छोरा 15 मिनट में ही पेपर छोड़ कर चलने लगा।
टीचर: क्या हुआ, पेपर नहीं आता क्या?
.
छोरा : वो बात नहीं है
मैं जिसके भरोसे आया था वो खुद मुझसे पूछ रहा है
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Old 16-09-2016, 11:45 AM   #12682
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Default Re: गुदगुदाते, चुटीले और मजेदार चुटकुले (Jokes)

विज्ञापन आता है की फलाना यूनिवर्सटी 400 एकड़ मे फैली है..मुझे आज तक समझ मे नही आयाये बच्चों को पढ़ने बुलाते है या चरने ? 
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Old 16-09-2016, 11:48 AM   #12683
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Default Re: गुदगुदाते, चुटीले और मजेदार चुटकुले (Jokes)

अ- से - अनार.........ज्ञ- से - ज्ञानी
a- से - apple.........z- से - zebra

दोनों भाषा की शुरुआत फल से होती है।

अंत मे हिन्दी आपको ज्ञानी बनाकर छोड़ती है,

और अंग्रेजी जानवर बनाकर.....

अब आप सोचिये की हमारी राष्ट्र भाषा का कितना महत्व है
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Old 16-09-2016, 12:13 PM   #12684
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Default Re: गुदगुदाते, चुटीले और मजेदार चुटकुले (Jokes)

मनपसंद मरम्मत का काम होने की खुशी में एक सज्जन ने मिस्त्री को 1000 रुपये की बख्शीश देते हुए कहा:---
"जा, तू भी क्या याद करेगा.....!!
आज शाम को वाइफ को सिनेमा ले जा और उसके बाद किसी रेस्तरां में खाना खा......!!"
शाम को दरवाजे की घंटी बजी,
दरवाजा खोला तो मिस्त्री साफ-सुथरे कपडे पहने खडा था...!!!
सज्जन ने उसे सिर से पैर तक देखा और पूछा:---
"कहिये मिस्त्री जी.....??"
.
मिस्त्री:--- जी, वाइफ को लेने आया हूं ...!!!!!!!!
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Old 17-09-2016, 08:53 PM   #12685
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Default Re: गुदगुदाते, चुटीले और मजेदार चुटकुले (Jokes)

एक अमीर आदमी अपने प्यारे डॉगी के साथ गार्डन में मॉर्निंग वाक कर रहा था. तभी अचानक झाड़ियों के पीछे से हाथ में रिवाल्वर लिए एक नकाबपोश निकला और उसने कुत्ते के ऊपर ताबड़तोड़ गोलियां चला कर उसे ढेर कर दिया लेकिन अमीर आदमी को कुछ नहीं किया.
आदमी को बहुत अजीब लगा …. उसने नकाबपोश से पूछा – “ये क्या किया भाई ?”
नकाबपोश बोला – “your wife gave me one lac rupee and said ‘Go & Kill that son-of-a-bitch…”
अमीर आदमी ने नकाबपोश को बांहों में भर लिया और उसे धन्यवाद देते हुए बोला – “भाई, मैं यह तो नहीं जानता कि तुम्हारा अंग्रेजी टीचर कौन था लेकिन जो भी था मैं उसका हमेशा अहसानमंद रहूँगा … !!!”
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Old 19-09-2016, 08:17 PM   #12686
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Default Re: गुदगुदाते, चुटीले और मजेदार चुटकुले (Jokes)

औरतों की सबसे बड़ी समस्या क्या होती है??

जब बहु बनती हैं, तब सास अच्छी नहीं मिलती.........

..............और जब सास बनती हैं, तब बहु अच्छी नहीं मिलती!!
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Old 19-09-2016, 10:48 PM   #12687
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Default Re: गुदगुदाते, चुटीले और मजेदार चुटकुले (Jokes)

अब ये अफवाह कौन फैला रहा है कि,,,
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
रिलाइंस ने jio सिर्फ इसलिए निकाली हैं, ताकि
भारत में फोकटियो की गिनती की जा सकें......
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Old 19-09-2016, 10:49 PM   #12688
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Default Re: गुदगुदाते, चुटीले और मजेदार चुटकुले (Jokes)

एक बालक जिद पर अड़ गया

बोला की "मिर्ची" खाऊंगा…

घरवालों ने बहुत समझाया
पर नहीं माना !!

हार कर उसके गुरु जी को बुलाया गया।
वे जिद तुड़वाने में महारथी थे…..

गुरु के आदेश पर "मिर्ची" मंगवाई गई.

उसे प्लेट में परोस बालक के सामने रखकर गुरु बोले,
ले ! अब खा…

बालक मचल गया.. बोला-

"तली हुई खाऊंगा.."

गुरु ने "मिर्ची" तलवाई और दहाड़े, "ले अब चुपचाप खा.."

बालक फिर गुलाटी मार गया
और बोला, आधी खाऊंगा…..

"मिर्ची" के दो टुकड़े किये गये..

अब बालक गुरुजी से बोला,
पहले आप खाओ….तभी मैं खाऊंगा

गुरु ने आंख नाक भींच किसी तरह आधी "मिर्ची" निगली…

गुरु के "मिर्ची" निगलते ही
बालक दहाड़ मार कर रोने लगा
की आप तो वो टुकड़ा खा गये
जो मुझे खाना था..

गुरु ने धोती सम्भाली और
वहां से भाग निकले,

करना-धरना कुछ नहीं,
नौटंकी दुनिया भर की…

वो ही बालक बड़ा होकर
"अरविन्द केजरीवाल"
के नाम से मशहुर हुआ…
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Old 19-09-2016, 10:49 PM   #12689
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Default Re: गुदगुदाते, चुटीले और मजेदार चुटकुले (Jokes)

पुराने ज़माने में औरतें अपने पति का नाम नहीं लेती थीं !

दो औरतें बात कर रही थीं। उनमे से एक औरत के पति का नाम धनिया था !
पहली औरत -बहन आज खाने में क्या बनाई हो !
दूसरी औरत -दाल भात सब्जी और रामू के बाप की चटनी !
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Old 21-09-2016, 10:31 PM   #12690
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Default Re: गुदगुदाते, चुटीले और मजेदार चुटकुले (Jokes)

एक मोटरसाइकल वाले ने पता पूछने के लिए संता से पूछा....

Excuse me... मुझे 'लाल किला' जाना है?

संता: तो जा ना भाई, ऐसे हर किसी को...

...बताते बताते जाएगा तो पहुंचेगा कब ??
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