Share Santa and Banta Jokes - Page 2

sony · 25-06-2010, 10:10 AM

Santa: Mujhe shadi me BMW mili hy,
Banta: Par tumhare pas to koi car nhi,

Santa: Aby ghadhe BMW ka matlab hy,
BOHAT MOTI WIFE.

************************************************** ****************

Maths Teacher Was Teaching Mathematical Conversions

Teacher: If 1000 Kgs = Ton. Then

For 3000 Kgs =How Much?

Santa:
Ton! Ton! Ton!

************************************************** ****************

Santa ke ghar Ladki ne janam liya..

Banta: jab ladki badi hogi to ladke ise chedenge.
Santa: Maine iska intejaam kar liye hai.
Banta: kya kiya?

Santa: Ladki ka naam DIDI rakh diya hai.

************************************************** ***************

Santa: Jail ko "Hawalaat" kyu kehte hy?

Banta: Kyu k jail me khane ko sirf

"Hawa" aur "Laat" hi milti hai.

sony · 25-06-2010, 10:10 AM

A sardar is traveling via train. On his way, he feels the urge to go to the bathroom. So he goes and opens the bathroom door, which happens to have a mirror in the front. The sardar thinks there is another sardar bhaiwaal in there, quickly shuts the door and returns to his seat. 5 minutes later he goes again, only to find the same sardar bhaiwaal. An hour passes away, he's made 20 trips to the bathroom, only to find that the same person is still there. So he finally gets ticked off, goes to the last
compartment and tells the TC (Ticket Checker) what's been going on. The TC, which also happens to be a sardar, feels bad for him and promises to throw the bum out. The TC walks down to the compartment with the troubled bathroom to get the resident bhaiwaal out. Few minutes later the TC comes back and tell the sardar "I'm
sorry, I can't do anything. The guy in there is a railway staff member".

sony · 25-06-2010, 10:11 AM

Bobby returns from his first day at school and immediately questions his father. " Dad, today we had a Spelling Class - All the other kids could only say half the alphabet, but I knew the whole thing. Is that because I am Sardar?" "No son, that's because you are intelligent. " Bobby seeming content with the answer, asks his father another question, "Dad, today we had Math class - All the other kids could only count from 1-10, I could count from 1 to 20. Is this because I am Sardar ??"
"No son, that's because you are intelligent," replies his father. Happy with the answer, Bobby poses another question to his father, "Dad, today we had Gym class. All the other boys had little small 3 inch penises, mine is at least 3 or 4 times that size. Is that because I am Sardar ??" The father replies, "No son, that's because you are 31 years old."

sony · 25-06-2010, 10:12 AM

Sardarji is selected to play for the Indian cricket team as an opening batsman. He opens the batting against West Indies. He is asked to face the very first over (with one Sunil Gavaskar as the non-striker!) from Marshall who is bowling at his fiercest...

First ball : Whizzes past Sardarji's off-stump. Sardarji doesn't move an inch. Ball goes to wicket-keeper. Second ball : Goes right over the Sardarji's bat and just over the middle stump, somehow missing both the bat and the stumps. Sardarji is again unmoved.

Third ball : Is a bouncer. Almost decapitates the Sardarji, missing his head by a fraction of an inch. Ball goes to wicket-keeper. Sardarji doesn't move a muscle.

Fourth ball : Outside the leg-stump. Sardarji again doesn't move, and the ball shoots past him to the wicket-keeper. But this time, the umpire shouts "No Ball!"

Sardarji walks up to the umpire and tells him, "So you discovered it now!You see, I know from the very beginning that the guy has no ball in his hand!"

priya · 03-07-2010, 07:19 AM

Sardar : My mobile bill how much?

Call Centre Girl : Sir, just dial 123 to know current bill status

Sardar : Stupid, not CURRENT bill, my MOBILE bill.

priya · 03-07-2010, 07:22 AM

Santa gets ready, wears his tie and coat; goes out, climbs a tree and sits on the branch regularly.

Banta asks why he does this.

Santa: "I've been promoted as branch manager."

priya · 03-07-2010, 07:25 AM

Santa and Sardarni

Sardarni caught his husband santa searching up and down in living room.
Sardarni: What are you searching?
Santa: Searching for hidden camera.
Sardarni: Why you think here is any hidden camera.
Sardar Santa: Because on tv always this guy is saying you are watching star world.

saurav · 27-08-2010, 09:58 PM

Santa goes for a movie…

Santa and a friend are sitting in a cinema. Just before the break they see a cactus and in some distance a cowboy. During the break the friend says to

Santa: "I bet the cowboy will ride into the cactus."

Santa answers: "I do not believe that."

They agree that the loser invites the winner to a bottle of wine after the film.

It turns out that the friend wins. So after the film they drink together the bottle of wine in a restaurant near the cinema.

Then the friend says: "I must confess that the bet was not fair. I saw the film for the second time."

Then Santa replies: "And I saw it for the fourth time, but I did not think that this fool rides into the cactus again."

amol · 26-11-2012, 06:59 PM

santa aur banta k bich mai fight ho rahi thi
banta:- saale mai tere kapde phaad k tujhe naanga kar doonga
santa:- dekh serious ladai mai romantic baat mat kar

amol · 26-11-2012, 07:00 PM

SANTA:Lalaji dettol soap hai,
Lala:ha,
santa:acha vala hai,
Lala:ha,
Santa: achi quality ka hai,
Lala:ha bhai ha,
Santa: thik hai hath dhokr 1kg aata do..

25-06-2010, 10:10 AM	#2
sony Member Join Date: Jan 2010 Posts: 243 Rep Power: 16	Sardar and unknown traveller A sardar is traveling via train. On his way, he feels the urge to go to the bathroom. So he goes and opens the bathroom door, which happens to have a mirror in the front. The sardar thinks there is another sardar bhaiwaal in there, quickly shuts the door and returns to his seat. 5 minutes later he goes again, only to find the same sardar bhaiwaal. An hour passes away, he's made 20 trips to the bathroom, only to find that the same person is still there. So he finally gets ticked off, goes to the last compartment and tells the TC (Ticket Checker) what's been going on. The TC, which also happens to be a sardar, feels bad for him and promises to throw the bum out. The TC walks down to the compartment with the troubled bathroom to get the resident bhaiwaal out. Few minutes later the TC comes back and tell the sardar "I'm sorry, I can't do anything. The guy in there is a railway staff member".

25-06-2010, 10:11 AM	#3
sony Member Join Date: Jan 2010 Posts: 243 Rep Power: 16	Sardar or intelligent Bobby returns from his first day at school and immediately questions his father. " Dad, today we had a Spelling Class - All the other kids could only say half the alphabet, but I knew the whole thing. Is that because I am Sardar?" "No son, that's because you are intelligent. " Bobby seeming content with the answer, asks his father another question, "Dad, today we had Math class - All the other kids could only count from 1-10, I could count from 1 to 20. Is this because I am Sardar ??" "No son, that's because you are intelligent," replies his father. Happy with the answer, Bobby poses another question to his father, "Dad, today we had Gym class. All the other boys had little small 3 inch penises, mine is at least 3 or 4 times that size. Is that because I am Sardar ??" The father replies, "No son, that's because you are 31 years old."

25-06-2010, 10:12 AM	#4
sony Member Join Date: Jan 2010 Posts: 243 Rep Power: 16	Sardarji and cricket match Sardarji is selected to play for the Indian cricket team as an opening batsman. He opens the batting against West Indies. He is asked to face the very first over (with one Sunil Gavaskar as the non-striker!) from Marshall who is bowling at his fiercest... First ball : Whizzes past Sardarji's off-stump. Sardarji doesn't move an inch. Ball goes to wicket-keeper. Second ball : Goes right over the Sardarji's bat and just over the middle stump, somehow missing both the bat and the stumps. Sardarji is again unmoved. Third ball : Is a bouncer. Almost decapitates the Sardarji, missing his head by a fraction of an inch. Ball goes to wicket-keeper. Sardarji doesn't move a muscle. Fourth ball : Outside the leg-stump. Sardarji again doesn't move, and the ball shoots past him to the wicket-keeper. But this time, the umpire shouts "No Ball!" Sardarji walks up to the umpire and tells him, "So you discovered it now!You see, I know from the very beginning that the guy has no ball in his hand!"

03-07-2010, 07:19 AM	#5
priya Member Join Date: Feb 2010 Posts: 110 Rep Power: 15	Mobile Bill Sardar : My mobile bill how much? Call Centre Girl : Sir, just dial 123 to know current bill status Sardar : Stupid, not CURRENT bill, my MOBILE bill.

03-07-2010, 07:22 AM	#6
priya Member Join Date: Feb 2010 Posts: 110 Rep Power: 15	Climbing a tree Santa gets ready, wears his tie and coat; goes out, climbs a tree and sits on the branch regularly. Banta asks why he does this. Santa: "I've been promoted as branch manager."

03-07-2010, 07:25 AM	#7
priya Member Join Date: Feb 2010 Posts: 110 Rep Power: 15	Santa and Sardarni Sardarni caught his husband santa searching up and down in living room. Sardarni: What are you searching? Santa: Searching for hidden camera. Sardarni: Why you think here is any hidden camera. Sardar Santa: Because on tv always this guy is saying you are watching star world.

27-08-2010, 09:58 PM	#8
saurav Member Join Date: Mar 2010 Posts: 22 Rep Power: 0	Santa goes for a movie… Santa and a friend are sitting in a cinema. Just before the break they see a cactus and in some distance a cowboy. During the break the friend says to Santa: "I bet the cowboy will ride into the cactus." Santa answers: "I do not believe that." They agree that the loser invites the winner to a bottle of wine after the film. It turns out that the friend wins. So after the film they drink together the bottle of wine in a restaurant near the cinema. Then the friend says: "I must confess that the bet was not fair. I saw the film for the second time." Then Santa replies: "And I saw it for the fourth time, but I did not think that this fool rides into the cactus again."

26-11-2012, 06:59 PM	#9
amol Special Member Join Date: Nov 2010 Location: Patal Lok Posts: 1,867 Rep Power: 17	Re: Share Santa and Banta Jokes santa aur banta k bich mai fight ho rahi thi banta:- saale mai tere kapde phaad k tujhe naanga kar doonga santa:- dekh serious ladai mai romantic baat mat kar

26-11-2012, 07:00 PM	#10
amol Special Member Join Date: Nov 2010 Location: Patal Lok Posts: 1,867 Rep Power: 17	Re: Share Santa and Banta Jokes SANTA:Lalaji dettol soap hai, Lala:ha, santa:acha vala hai, Lala:ha, Santa: achi quality ka hai, Lala:ha bhai ha, Santa: thik hai hath dhokr 1kg aata do..