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Old 08-10-2015, 07:50 PM   #11801
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Default Re: गुदगुदाते, चुटीले और मजेदार चुटकुले (Jokes)

कार्डियोलॉजिस्ट और गब्बर सिंह में क्या समानता है ?
.
.
दोनो यही बोलते हैं कि तूने नमक खाया है अब गोली खा..!
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Old 08-10-2015, 07:55 PM   #11802
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Default Re: गुदगुदाते, चुटीले और मजेदार चुटकुले (Jokes)

एक गांव में दो अफीमची रहते थे, नाकारा होने के कारण लोग उन्हें हिकारत की नजरों से देखते थे। आखिरकार उन्होंने कुछ करने का फैसला किया।

पहला : ये सामने वाली जमीन में गन्ना लगाते हैं।

दूसरा : तू इन गांव वालों को जानता नहीं है, सारे गन्ने ये चूस लेंगे।

पहला : तू सही कहता है, पहले इनका ही इलाज कर देते हैं। दोनों ने गांव की झोपड़ियों में आग लगा दी। सब चीखते-चिल्लाते हुए आग बुझाने में लगे थे। और दोनों एक टीले पर बैठ कर चिल्ला रहे थे, ‘और चूसो गन्ना...।’
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Old 08-10-2015, 07:56 PM   #11803
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Default Re: गुदगुदाते, चुटीले और मजेदार चुटकुले (Jokes)

गर्लफ्रेंड : आज मेरे पापा ने तुम्हें खाने पर बुलाया है।
ब्वॉयफ्रेंड​ : वाह यार.. अचानक कैसे?
गर्लफ्रेंड : अरे वो श्राद्ध के लिए कौवे नहीं मिल रहे थे, इसलिए!!
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Old 08-10-2015, 07:56 PM   #11804
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Default Re: गुदगुदाते, चुटीले और मजेदार चुटकुले (Jokes)

टीचर : ‘डेट’ और ‘तारीख’ में क्या अंतर है?
स्टूडेंट : सर ‘डेट’ पर लड़कियों के साथ जाते हैं और ‘तारीख’ पर वकील के साथ।
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Old 08-10-2015, 07:57 PM   #11805
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Default Re: गुदगुदाते, चुटीले और मजेदार चुटकुले (Jokes)

हाथी की बाइक बिगड़ गई, चींटी ने उसे अपनी स्कूटी पर लिफ्ट दी।
रास्ते में चींटी ने हाथी से कहा, ‘यार जरा नीचे होकर बैठ जा।’
हाथी: क्यों?
चींटी: अगर डैड ने देख लिया, तो बेवजह का बवाल हो जाएगा।
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Old 08-10-2015, 07:59 PM   #11806
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Default Re: गुदगुदाते, चुटीले और मजेदार चुटकुले (Jokes)

जिसने सिगरेट बनाई उसने कभी सपने में भी नहीं सोचा होगा कि भारत में सिगरेट को ‘दवा’ के रूप में प्रयोग किया जाएगा। यहां आधे लड़के खाना खाने के बाद उसे पचाने के लिए सिगरेट को "लवण भास्कर चूर्ण’ की तरह लेते हैं और बाकी आधे तो सुबह उठकर प्रेशर बनाने के लिए इसको "कायमचूर्ण’ की तरह इस्तेमाल करते हैं। हद है भई!
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Old 08-10-2015, 07:59 PM   #11807
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Default Re: गुदगुदाते, चुटीले और मजेदार चुटकुले (Jokes)

पहले मैं बहुत काम करता था, फिर मेरी नौकरी लग गई!
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Old 08-10-2015, 08:01 PM   #11808
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Default Re: गुदगुदाते, चुटीले और मजेदार चुटकुले (Jokes)

Me : तुम कितने साल की हो?
She : 17 साल।
Me : अरे शनिवार-रविवार तो जोड़ लेती बहन।
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Old 08-10-2015, 08:09 PM   #11809
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Default Re: गुदगुदाते, चुटीले और मजेदार चुटकुले (Jokes)

कर्मचारी : सर मैंने अपने आधार कार्ड को अपने बैंक अकाउंट से लिंक भी नहीं करवाया, फिर भी मेरे अकाउंट में गैस की 200 रुपए सब्सिडी आ गई।
बॉस : वह सब्सिडी नहीं है, तुम्हारा इंक्रीमेंट लगा है।
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Old 08-10-2015, 08:11 PM   #11810
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Default Re: गुदगुदाते, चुटीले और मजेदार चुटकुले (Jokes)

पत्नी ने पति को जैविक खाद से उगी सब्जियां लाने को कहा।
पति (सब्जी वाले से) : मुझे यह सब्जियां अपनी बीवी के लिए चाहिए। इस पर किसी रसायन पदार्थ या जहरीले पदार्थ का छिड़काव तो नहीं किया?
सब्जी वाला : नहीं साहब, यह काम आपको खुद करना पड़ेगा।
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