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Old 16-05-2019, 02:31 PM   #1
आकाश महेशपुरी
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Default घनाक्षरी छंद ~ फटेहाल बच्चे

घनाक्षरी छंद ~ फटेहाल बच्चे
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स्वयं पे ही सभी रहते हैं वशीभूत अब,
कोई भी किसी का नहीं सुनता जहान में।

भूख और प्यास लिये मरते मनुष्य पर,
लोग तो यकीन अब रखते हैं श्वान में।

श्वान को खिलाया नहलाया व घुमाया जाता,
कभी सड़कों पे कभी कार में बागान में।

किन्तु कई लाख बच्चे हो के फटेहाल हाय,
जूठन गिलास धोते चाय की दुकान में।

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Old 22-05-2019, 07:52 AM   #2
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Default Re: घनाक्षरी छंद ~ फटेहाल बच्चे

बहुत सुंदर. हमारी सामाजिक व्यवस्था की पोल खोलने वाली रचना. गरीब और कुपोषित बच्चों की दुर्दशा की ओर पाठक का ध्यान खींचा गया है. धन्यवाद, मित्र.
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Old 26-05-2019, 04:29 PM   #3
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Default Re: घनाक्षरी छंद ~ फटेहाल बच्चे

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Originally Posted by आकाश महेशपुरी View Post
घनाक्षरी छंद ~ फटेहाल बच्चे
★★★★★★★★★★★★★★
स्वयं पे ही सभी रहते हैं वशीभूत अब,
कोई भी किसी का नहीं सुनता जहान में।

भूख 399
Nice Bhai
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Old 29-05-2019, 09:14 PM   #4
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Default Re: घनाक्षरी छंद ~ फटेहाल बच्चे

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Originally Posted by rajnish manga View Post
बहुत सुंदर. हमारी सामाजिक व्यवस्था की पोल खोलने वाली रचना. गरीब और कुपोषित बच्चों की दुर्दशा की ओर पाठक का ध्यान खींचा गया है. धन्यवाद, मित्र.
हार्दिक आभार आदरणीय!
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Old 29-05-2019, 09:15 PM   #5
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Default Re: घनाक्षरी छंद ~ फटेहाल बच्चे

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Nice Bhai
Thank you very much
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Old 01-06-2019, 10:16 AM   #6
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Default Re: घनाक्षरी छंद ~ फटेहाल बच्चे

टंकण त्रुटि सुधार~
रचना की दूसरी पंक्ति कृपया इस प्रकार पढ़ें...
"कोई भी किसी की नहीं सुनता जहां में"
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